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THE NEW RULES FOR DRIVING IN EDMONTON:
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1. You must first learn to pronounce the city name, it is: 'ED-MIN-TIN'.
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2. The morning rush hour is from 5:00 a.m. to noon. The evening rush- f. v1 B% i' T1 c9 r. m/ X
hour is from noon to 8:00 p.m. Friday's rush hour starts on Thursday4 A. k4 `5 G( M2 i( J, t0 _+ I0 v4 V
morning.. H, c; G0 U3 n* @9 I9 L
. g) r# D4 K D. K @3. The minimum acceptable speed on most freeways is 130 kph. On the QE2,! p( L0 Z+ c# V
you are expected to match the speed of the airplanes coming in for a+ N, b, \+ Z4 g0 T: ^, b. }, C' c
landing at the airport. Anything less is considered 'Wussy'.8 m4 J: i, T' S* |
# y% L: s$ m* Q( N: j. D/ x4. Forget the traffic rules you learned elsewhere. Edmonton now has its
+ ^ n* x" M& W* Hown version of traffic rules. For example, cars/trucks with the loudest5 L, Z6 j: p4 O' I* g# e2 b
muffler go first at a four-way stop; the trucks with the biggest tires3 p7 N! |! A; h5 y- t0 u
go second. However, in Southwest Edmonton, SUV-driving, cell4 P. M/ H* h3 _
phone-talking moms ALWAYS have the right of way.
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2 d+ Q! X& o2 G' I! B! P/ N5. If you actually stop at a yellow light, you will be rear ended,6 J# P& H5 A% D6 d6 C' a, e
cussed out, and possibly shot.
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6. Never honk at anyone. Ever. Seriously. It's another offense that can
" D% n e6 M+ W5 R4 [, @0 ]$ kget you shot.* X2 S4 L7 g9 F( m
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7. Exception to Rule #6: If you are the 4th car back from a light that1 i2 D' E( K" P
has turned green, you must honk your horn to alert the vehicle first at% R& ? l4 [- v2 A
the intersection that the light has changed. Vehicle 2 & 3 won't shoot( F7 K3 _% N1 B7 C: \
you as they are too busy trying to figure out how to ram the first4 u: W- H8 G3 O1 U$ U
vehicle through the intersection.9 |3 Q# H5 g% L8 R
* S5 N) P& I% j' T8 L) @8. Road construction is permanent and continuous in Edmonton. Detour/ \* j* Y7 U. E. Y6 |$ C- c
barrels are moved around during the middle of the night to make the next; Q# ^# I" Z; I0 x9 |7 f3 P2 a/ k
day's driving a bit more exciting, but nothing ever gets finished, and w" I/ S$ K* L& g. K
more construction starts everyday. q: G; O4 @# f A% ^$ D; y
( L# }; M7 D' B) }9. Watch carefully for road hazards such as skunks, dogs, cats,
: K; R9 [5 ~1 Q8 qdeer, barrels, cones, cows, horses, mattresses, shredded tires, garbage,
( O( _- [/ g: v: j& c8 g2 z5 Hsquirrels, rabbits, crows, and coyotes feeding on any of these items.
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10. Calgary Trail, Gateway Boulevard, Highway 2 and the QE2 are the same; K% p: t" n9 j( n. }8 J2 }' U
road. In the same manner, Whyte Avenue, Sherwood Park Freeway and Wye/ ?4 U' o* |: l# z6 I
Road are the same road; Wayne Gretzky Drive, 75 Street and
+ m! w9 ^8 _, G3 ^* Q66 Street are also the same road; got it?: t& _# J; [, Z& K4 |: J
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11. If someone actually has their turn signal on, wave them to the( P& A; t/ v' D) e A/ h
shoulder immediately to let them know it has been 'accidentally
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/ ~! ^- d4 S7 s2 C( ]) \12. If you are in the left lane and only driving 110 in a 80-90 km zone,
* V1 ~( X( a# z4 Hyou are considered a road hazard and will be 'flipped off'
$ [# H# ? X. b7 ?accordingly. If you return the flip, you'll be shot.
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13. For winter driving, it is advisable to wear your parka, toque, fur
/ N3 C; S" R9 o' K+ D3 M% r% Xlined mittens and mukluks. Make sure you have a shovel, food, candle and% G9 M2 H8 g' A& v# _! }
blankets in the vehicle. |
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发表于 2010-2-16 12:01
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发表于 2010-2-16 22:55
